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I realized that at my income level "Wealth Management" really just means re-organizing the money in my wallet by denomination.
So you think you can study with your facebook activated? That`s cute! ^.^
I`ll never become mature enough to not laugh out loud when the person in the stall next to me farts so loud it sounds like a volcano just erupted.
my 2012 new year’s resolution is to be more optimistic by keeping my cup half-full with either rum, vodka, or whiskey.
Hate when my GF asks me to hold her purse at the grocery store line cause I really don`t like being that guy holding two purses.
Please respect the revolving door speed that has already been established.
A simpler, more believable theory is that all the dinosaurs got married and just quit having sex all together.
It`s not an attitude problem, it`s the way I am.
A conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking.
Oh, a spider just landed on my desk... In other news,,, When startled, I can jump 5 feet in the air with just the power of my ass cheeks.
Dear Fox news,I have yet to see any news about foxes. Sincerely, disappointed viewer.
Tequila is Spanish for I’m open to waking up anywhere.
If Shakespeare is correct and "all the world is a stage" then I seriously would like to be in control of that trap door.
Oh really? It takes fewer muscles to smile than to frown? How many muscles does it take to mind your own business
My "Kiss me, I`m Irish" shirt only seems to be working on my dog.