😄 Daily Silly Status
Your home to over 25,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Marriage is a relationship in which one person is always right and the other is the husband.
Ever notice that people who spend money on beer, cigarettes and lottery tickets, are always complaining about being broke and not feeling well?
Because of tanning beds, 1000 years from now archaeologists will think we used to fry people as punishment.
It would be cool if you heard a thunder bug a few seconds after you saw a lightning bug.
I`m for driverless cars, but honestly, having to drive is the only thing standing in the way of me being a complete drunk piece of sh!t 24/7
I have NEVER faked a sarcasm in my life ;)
Life is far too short to remove the USB safely.
People who describe things as "better than sex" are obviously having the wrong kind of sex.
Cats don`t come with instructions, so how is anyone supposed to know you can`t put them in the washing machine.
Tonight I’m going to have my favorite drink. It’s called “a lot.”
If the shoe fits, shove it further up their a$$
Would the 2 Sonic dudes just get it over with and kiss already
My coworkers sending dirty messages to other coworkers when I leave my computer unlocked is why I have trust issues. ... and dates.
Whenever I feel that someone is about to sneeze I yell “PIKA!” & they’re like “CHU!”. I don’t have any friends.
Letting the cat out of the bag is a whole lot easier than putting it back in.