Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Wrapping these baby carrots in Tootsie Roll wrappers is exhausting but the payoff will be worth it come Halloween.
If a guy runs his fingers through your hair, there is a 33.3% chance you are being used as a napkin.
FYI: The signs that say "Falling Rocks"....I tried it.....it doesn`t.
I`m never more nervous than when I tell a doctor what I actually eat.
Is there ever a day when mattresses are not on sale?
It`s a recipe for disaster when your country has an obesity epidemic and a skinny jean fad.
You know that you have eaten way too much junk food when you start actually craving something healthy.
The Never Ending Story should`ve been a movie about a phone call from my Mother
I like to spend Monday morning trying to remember what I was avoiding doing at work on Friday.
Three guys walk into a bar. Two ended up with a concussion, the other needed 4 stitches.
Sometime when I`m home alone I like to fill my bathtub with spaghetti and pretend I`m a meatball.!
Example of the difference between `You`re`and `Your`: 1. "You`re nuts" = "You are nuts" 2. "Your nuts" = "What about my nuts?"
If you`re in WalMart and you`re holding in a fart, just remember, YOU`RE IN WALMART!!
That awkward moment when you can’t tell if it’s a Halloween costume or their regular clothes…
Scariest Moment: Flushing the toilet at someone else’s house, and seeing the water rise…