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Of course your opinion matters. Just not to me.
I`m at the age where I need at least 3 weeks advance notice before doing anything spontaneous
How do you people have the time to hate a stranger on the internet?
There`s a word for people like you ... "leave"
Adding β€œand sh!t” to the end of a sentence to make it sound cooler and sh!t.
If you get angry, just take deep breaths and count to ten. Unless you`re angry about oxygen and numbers.
lifes a laugh, start living it!
Hand dryers are a great way to see how your hands look while skydiving.
Porn is the only type of entertainment where "not watching the whole thing" means it was good.
Why do people with the most to say contribute the least?
If that was me in the movie Taken, my dad would have missed the call and emailed me 3 days later asking if I have a job yet
I need to hire someone who will follow me around and just knock the unhealthy food out of my hand.
I saw a comedian one time who did nothing but make geography puns. talk abbottabad act.
Masturbating in front of your partner in the hope that she’ll join does not always work. And people on the bus stare at you.
The only people without problems are in the cemetery.