Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
How do you know you`re old? ... Check your glove box for paper maps ...
You guys ever trip out on the fact that Indian people eat Indian food for breakfast?
Few things in life are more pleasurable than turning off the lights in a public bathroom while people are still inside.
Iām better at remembering people who have bad breath than important historical facts.
Fun Fact: For the cost of a dozen red roses, you could also get a dozen beers and a dozen wings at happy hour. Prob even pay for parking too
This "doing nothing" is hard work, how am I supposed to know when I`m done?
These animal crackers are crap, this elephant tastes exactly like that giraffe did.
I have the worst case of morning sickness. No I am not pregnant, my body just rejects mornings.
Facebook should just change it`s name to "People You May Want to Avoid."
I was admiring my six pack in the mirror for two hours,then it got cold and I put it in the fridge
Save water- shower with me!
A worm is a pretty disappointing prize for getting up early if you ask me.
It only takes a few seconds to show someone how you feel about them,The police call it indecent exposure but whatever...
I`m sick and tired of people telling me to turn off lights to save the environment. I tried it once, and I nearly killed some guy on a bike.
Most of the lies I tell aren`t even true!