Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Do you know what really makes me smile? Facial muscles.
I`m in the awkward time period between not wanting to have pants on, and having to wait for the pizza guy right now...
You know you`re up really late at night when you turn on ESPN and 2 white guys are boxing!
I just wanted you all to know that I’m leaving Facebook. This ride has been a blast and I’ve made a ton of friends who I really do consider friends in the truest sense. Your humor and wit is amazing. I’ll miss all of you, but I’ve decided I need to spend more time with my family. So... see you after breakfast
I love you all so much right now because, well, alcohol.
Life is so much funnier if you have a dirty mind
Health experts recommend a 1500 calorie diet. For those of you not good with math... that’s a 12-pack of 125 calorie beers. You`re welcome!!! ;)
For parents of small children, weekends are about as relaxing as showering with cats.
Our phones fall, we panic. Our friends fall, we laugh.
To everybody that is single don`t worry you will have your day............ Palm Sunday is just around the corner
I hate when people call me and ask "WHO IS THIS?"
Did you ever stop to think that maybe vodka is addicted to ME?
Tomorrow is Valentines day, a holiday that comes along once a year to remind you that if you don`t have a special someone...I guess your alone.
With names like "Batman" and "Robin", you`d think they could fly...
I don’t know how your day is going, but I just got lucky on the couch! Yep, I found a dollar!