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I was thinking earlier, thats all, just wanted everyone to know that it does happen from time to time........
A recent survey of one person revealed that 100% of me thinks that I should leave work early.
That`s a horrible idea ... What time?
Nothing says "I dont take you seriously" like your dog wagging his tail when you`re yelling at him.
New documentary movie about white trash ... I only saw the trailer...
You mean.. people run? On purpose? When nobody is chasing them?
Just bought me a medical alert bracelet that says... "probably just sh!tfaced"
Whenever you`re feeling really bad about yourself just remember, there`s people that pay money to exercise.
This Tequila tastes like an afternoon of fun and bad decisions.
Yoga is a great way to meet and embarrass yourself in front of women
I looked up "thesaurus" in my thesaurus and it says "Don`t be a smart-a$$".
It`s really cold out there folks. If you`re heading to Wal-Mart, please wear two pairs of pajamas.
Note to self: stop buying stuff on Ebay when drunk. Anyone need a zamboni?
As a kid, I used to be afraid of the dark. Now as an adult, I love the dark because Iām terrified of the electricity bill.
People who learned a bunch of stuff must have felt pretty stupid when Wikipedia came out.