š Daily Silly Status
Your home to over 25,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
The first to apologize is the bravest. The first to forgive is the strongest. The first to open the vodka is the smartest.
Will be drunk until further notice.
Sorry I`m late, the floor was lava
Mary, mary quit contrary, watched their garden thrive. The cops found seed of a very odd weed; Now they`s doing three to five.
Hummingbirds are just regular birds that can`t remember the lyrics.
You should always love a woman for her personality. We have so many to choose from.
I`ve been holding my stomach in for 3 years now so don`t talk to me about dedication!
Exercise makes you look better naked. Alcohol does the same, you pick..
You say Iām dirty minded, but how did you understand what I meant?
No way Iām the only one who crosses their fingers, closes their eyes & holds their breath when checking their account balance.
Some psychologists say that sleeping naked can help boost a person`s confidence, but nobody in this park seems to appreciate it.
You can call someone who makes prosthetics a professional body builder
An ex asking to stay friends after you break up is like a kidnapper asking to stay in touch after they let you go.
If you heard twenty minutes of moaning from my bedroom that was just me trying to stand up.
Our swear jar is always empty because of all the god damn foul mouthed thieves that live in this f*cking house.