😄 Daily Silly Status

Your home to over 25,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!

If it weren`t for WebMD I would have never known what symptoms to mimic so I could get all these prescriptions from my doctor.
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Couch pillows are really just fart silencers.
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Sorry I’m cranky. I didn’t get my nap in today.
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"Grow a pear." - How to insult an apple tree.
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I believe pizza delivery cars should be allowed to use sirens
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Avoid parking tickets by leaving your wipers on high.
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Yes, milk from cows tastes nice. But to the person that first found that out...you have issues bro
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You are intriguing. You require further stalking, sorry I mean investigation.
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they say there`s love in every corner....gosh I think I`m moving in circles
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You`ve got to love yourself. But not in public places.
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This Kit Kat commercial is making some awfully big assumptions about both my generosity and my number of friends.
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I guess not everyone at this grocery store is as comfortable with my nudity as I am. ;)
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"It`s not you, it`s me." -Twins looking at some family photos
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I found my first grey pubic hair today. Normally things like this don`t bother me, but it was in my Big Mac.
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Girls just wanna have funds.
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