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If robbers ever broke into my house and searched for money, I`d just laugh and search with them.
Hell hath no fury like me when I’m slightly inconvenienced and hungry.
I was pretty sure that at this point in my career I would have henchmen by now!
Keep talking; someday you’ll say something intelligent.
Without facebook: more sleep, less drama, and a life!
When things get to stressful I hit the jim.......... Beam.
Rick Ross be rapping about cars he can`t even fit in.
Why do people say ``I saw it with my own eyes." Do they sometimes use other peoples eyes?
I enjoy a bit of unnecessary swearing as much as the next f*cker.
I`ve found a new coping mechanism....................COOKIES!
The original creator of the phrase “common sense” surely didn’t know many people.
DOCTORS WRITING: "?? ?? ??." HOW I SEE IT: "?????." HOW THE PHARMACIST SEES IT: "Aspirin."
Facebook reminds me of what my grandpa always used to say, `Who are you people and what are you all jabbering about anyway?`
Somewhere, right now.. One of my Facebook friends is already drunk!
Research is what I`m doing when I don`t know what I`m doing.