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"If you can`t handle me at my worst, then you don`t deserve me at my best" literally translates to "I`m a loud, sloppy drunk."
is frickin awesome! Nough Said.
Whoever said, "All men are created equal", has obviously never been to a nude beach
Did you know, the designated driver is usually the guy having the most luck with the ladies.
Whenever I try cleaning my room I either end up making a bigger mess, or just playing with the stuff I thought I lost.
I work out by ordering a small drink at Burger King, then get up 100 times to refill it.
It`s always awkward the first time you hold hands with someone because they usually want to know who you are and why you just grabbed them.
shoutout to people who have money but still order off the dollar menu
Roses are red, violets are blue, sandwiches are tasty, rhyming is hard
People who don`t understand sarcasm are awesome.
I work so hard for my gta V character to have a better life
I am bored. Anyone need anything avenged?
Saying a prayer for all the turkeys today. Also the single people with concerned relatives.
They say I have a drinking problem. I say they have a problem with nudity.
I Don`t Care If you Don`t Like Me .. Iam Not A Facebook Status :D