Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Women are always complaining that men are messy by leaving clothes layin around…..That’s because women take up all the closets
off to bed...evil schemes don`t dream themselves up.
life is like a bed of roses just got to whatch out for the pricks
Yesterday I jokingly asked my wife what she was burning for dinner. Turns out it was all my personal belongings.
I did 10 minutes of cardio this morning. I was still drunk from last night, and I was trying to tie my shoes but whatever.
The early bird catches the worm. And the late bird catches one of the other trillion worms left. What`s your point?
Care less and you’ll stress less.
During the first two weeks of January, people often resolve to lose weight, which is great for me because the line at Golden Corral is much shorter.
I bet Waldo`s parents are worried sick.
A new study found that legalizing marijuana in Colorado has created more than 10,000 jobs...by keeping Taco Bell open 24 hours.
Hoodie Footie Pajamas from Pajamagram; because nothing tells a girl you love her like giving her something to cover up her body from head to toe before she gets in your bed.
The problem with this generation boils down to this one thing: Their cartoons suck.
I can`t really walk the walk, or talk the talk. But, if you need someone to drink the drink, I`m your man!
If I keep hitting the treadmill like I do every night, in a few weeks maybe I`ll learn to turn on the light when I get up to pee in the dark
FACT: Men are much less likely to divulge a secret than women. Probably because they weren`t really listening to begin with.