Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
I just don`t want to look back and think "I could`ve eaten that"
Actually I don`t think it would be all that hard to get out of a pickle.
often rambles on and on about this and that seeming to be heading towards a point but really just blabbing about nothing.
That amazing moment when you smack the remote and it actually works!
Upside to hurricanes... you might get a free boat delivered to your front yard.
is in his own little world but it´s okay they know me here.
If pi is 3.14, then I think .99 is a good deal for 2 doughnuts.
The best things in life can`t be seen or touched....well, at least that`s what the restraining order says.
Why do I even have unlimited texting?
Turns out the plastic bag they put in your ice bucket at a hotel isn`t for to-go bacon from the breakfast buffet.
If "Cops" has taught me anything it`s to stay away from people with blurry faces, they`re nothing but trouble...
Stop leaving me messages. If I ever wanted to talk to you again, I wouldn’t have borrowed all that money.
Basically anything you buy at the hardware store looks like you`re getting ready to take hostages.
Ugh, I forgot to go to the gym today. That`s 9 years in a row now...
I can always tell when I`m drunk. I tend to drop things...like my standards