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If gas prices keep going up I`m cutting off the bottom of my car and I`m "Flintstoning" That mf!
I was laying down, looking up at the stars while I was writing this post. Then it dawned on me; `Where the heck is the ceiling?`
My internet went down for about 5 minutes earlier....so I talked to my family.....they seem like nice people!
Somewhere, a smart Lasik surgeon has an office full of brochures that are all slightly out of focus and a recovery room where they have clear print.
I`m sorry call me old fashioned,but i think your shorts should be longer than your vagina...
I was sitting in traffic the other day. That’s probably why I got run over.
I`m sorry but, I could not hear you over the sound of my internal hope that you would shut the f*ck up.
I really need a day inbetween Saturday an Sunday
Facebook: Making stalking people much more convenient since 2004.
It really freaks me out that I have a skeleton living inside me......
me + you = overpopulation... :) :p
Facebook- to help future generations discover if there`s ever been any mental illness in the family.
According to WebMD, MedicineNet, Healthline, Mayo Clinic, Symptom Checker, NetDoctor, MedlinePlus, Johns Hopkins and InfoMedNet, I`m OCD.
A homeless guy asked me for money today and I thought, sure, he’s probably just gonna spend it on booze and cigarettes. Then I remembered, that’s what I was gonna do, so we walked to the store together.
Common Sense is so rare, it should be classified as a super power.