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If a man speaks at sea where no women can hear, is he still wrong?
My roommate is on a date and said he`s convinced she`s coming home with him tonight. I`ve covered his room in Justin Bieber posters. Now we wait.
Every semicolon I have ever used has been a complete guess
Tennis is like marrying for money. Love means nothing.
Bathtub` spelled backwards is still `bathtub`. It`s not, but for a second there, you believed me.
If you think about it,, Batman was pretty lazy about naming all his stuff.
is pondering why people have a favorite color M&M when they all taste the same!
I`ve never had a windshield wiper setting that truly satisfied me.
A party without Vodka is just a meeting.
Settle down homemade play dough parents.
Patience is what I have when there are too many witnesses.
Well that’s a wrap on another day where I act like I know what I’m doing
I never thought you could really guess too low whenever a woman asks you her age. I guess 6 was pushing it.
"I" before "E" except after "Old MacDonald had a farm"
Sorry I said "nice phone" when you showed me a photo of your baby.