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I thought about going outside and doing something today but my Wi-Fi really doesn’t reach very far.
If airports are so safe, why are the buildings called Terminal
I am, have to avoid the leg cramps during sex, years old.
I should be able to take a sick day if I am sick of the people I work with.
I wish I were an octopus so that the answer to all of my problems would be, `change color and escape in a cloud of ink`
The best stories ever told always end with the words”…and then I got the hell out of there.”
Cheers, to judging people who spell words wrong in their statuses.
Life..it`s just an `F` in lie....
I’m supporting our troops today by going commando.
My new year`s resolution is to stop making new year`s resolutions.
I`m eating a vegan lunch today. Sure, it`s six sleeves of Smarties and a Diet Coke, but I`m still better than you.
I don`t care how old I am, if I go out to eat and there are crayons and paper place mats with puzzles...GAME ON!!
Everything just seems much better when you`re in denial
I would not mind living next to a serial killer. They never kill the neighbor. He`s the one that`s always on the news later saying "He was a quite guy, never really talked to anyone." Wait a minute ... I don`t talk to my neighbors!
Im really not just some idiot with nothing better to do with my time, I just play one in FB.