Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Don’t tell me what to do unless you’re naked.
Funniest thing ever heard on TV. "Ward, you were a little hard on the Beaver last night"
Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall, Humpty Dumpty had a great fall (he also had a pretty good summer too).
Amazon’s recommendations are like that friend who heard you say “ninja” once and then got you ninja stuff for your birthday every year for twenty years
We all need to take great interest in our future because we will spend the rest of our life there.
Sure, Men love funny women. As long as they are pretty...and skinny...and they have a great pair of knockers!!
can´t seem to find love. but its okay. I know exactly where the beer is.
Do whatever you want. And if it’s something you’re going to regret in the morning…sleep late.
The parent-teacher conference is going great. They have no idea I’m not the teacher.
A graham cracker is just a white dude selling coke in the ghetto.
You will always be my best friend ... You know too much.
Does anyone have plans to stare at their phones somewhere exciting this weekend?
I was at a nice restaurant tonight and accidentally left out a loud fart. 4 people turned around. For a minute, I thought I was on "The Voice".
Abstinence makes the arm grow stronger ... at least one of them anyway.
My ex was an absolute treasure and by treasure I mean you`ll need a shovel and map to find him.