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The word "Lovers" bums me out unless it`s between the words "Meat" and "Pizza".
What idiot named them jet skis instead of boatercycles?
Didn`t ya`ll know awkward moments existed before? Damn, its like the Yolocaust all over again...
Saw a chameleon today. So I guess it`s safe to say it was a pretty sh!tty chameleon.
I get a little nervous eating cucumber in a single woman`s home.
I am, have to avoid the leg cramps during sex, years old.
You know it`s way past your bed time when the 1-800-dial-a-hoe commercials come on.
You could completely eliminate the semicolon key and 90% of America wouldn`t notice... until they needed to wink at somebody.
Judging from my last 5 relationships I am convinced my heart is trying to kill me
Whenever I try cleaning my room I either end up making a bigger mess, or just playing with the stuff I thought I lost.
I`d hit that. - women drivers
Shot my first turkey today...scared the crap out of everyone in the frozen food section. It was awesome!
This day needs more yesterday.
Im still waiting for Anheuser-Bush to name a beer "responsibly" so i can drink it!
How`d this get posted?