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Today`s big idea - Coffee eye drops
I`m not sure why they gave all these other people cars.
I usually don`t argue with the doctor but I don`t think "Batshit Crazy" is a legitimate medical term.
Nice try Jehovah’s Witnesses but dressing up like cops and telling me you have a warrant is not going to get me to open my door.
I did responsible things all day so tonight will consist of nothing that even resembles responsibility.
The awkward moment when you look both ways down a one way street.
Please: No,No.No-More about how you think relationships should be: we`ve got it , Your Single,,- get off facebook and go take your own expert advise...
I would’ve slept my way to the top years ago if it actually involved sleeping.
As I slid my finger slowly down her G string, I thought to myself "this is a nice guitar"
Dear Kelloggs, Cereal that makes them go back to sleep. Sincerely, Tired parents
The secret to happiness is a good sense of humor and a bad memory.
Try Zumba, It`s awesome ... on my way to the emergency room.
My head has that drunk on cheap alcohol feel without me getting to actually drink the alcohol :(
I went to see the doctor today for my annual check-up. The good news is the he says I`m healthy as a horse. The bad news is he uses large farm animals to
I’m bored, think I’ll go to the mall, find a great parking spot, sit in my car with my reverse lights on for awhile.