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People, like prescription drugs, should have to list the side effects they`re likely to cause.
So they say that having to much sex can cause memory loss, which is just a little something I seem to remember reading in a Rolling Stone magazine once on page 64 paragraphs 3 through 5 while sitting on a park bench October 14th 2002 at 3:46 p.m
I`m starting to think the Hangover Fairy and the Angel of Death are the same person.
Paint thinner? I call bullsh!t. I been painting myself with it all week and I`m still fat.
Chuck Norris doesn`t flush the toilet...he just scare the sh!t out of it.
Accidentally took a women`s multi vitamin & I`ve been trying to get dressed for the past 3 hours, but everything is making me look fat.
My life is a constant cycle of waiting until the weekend and then not doing anything when it comes.
Love is a two way street but you have to be careful because women can’t drive.
It may appear like I`m doing nothing, but i`m actively waiting for my problems to go away!!!
This ramen noodle and vienna sausage dinner taste exactly like I made the wrong career choice :(
Congratulations on becoming a homeowner! From now on, every noise you hear will cost you money.
There`s a Bullying Support Group meeting, tomorrow night at 8 ... You`d better f*cking be there.
Starbucks isn`t really that expensive compared to how much Victoria`s Secret charges per cup.
wishes that more people would declare thumb wars these days. I`m sure that all this texting has prepared my thumb muscles for battle.
Stay Calm, take a breath, and reload.