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Do you ever get that feeling that you are being watched? Because if it is bothering you, I can stop.
Facebook prank #23 Go in everynight and change your birthday to the next day...then see how long it takes for people to catch on....
that awkward moment when your pulling the covers up and hit yourself in the damn face !!!
Never let the printer know that you are in a hurry.
Irons are like 1000 degrees, who`s bright idea was it to make an ironing board the flimsiest contraption ever made?
Has it ever occurred to optimists and pessimists that the glass is refillable?
Too bored to do nothing. Too lazy to do anything.
Shouldn`t the Air and Space museum be empty?
I think you people lied to me...exactly how much of this hair of the dog do I have to eat before this hangover goes away?
Cop cars should play the jaws theme song
It`s fun to chant "Bloody Mary" three times into your car`s side mirror while driving at night and watch her jog to keep up
So far the "couch" part of couch-to-5k is easily my favorite.
According to the 19 citations I got for trespassing and peeping, “neighborhood watch” isn’t what I thought it was.
My ex was an absolute treasure and by treasure I mean you`ll need a shovel and map to find him.
You know that little thing inside your head that keeps you from saying things you shouldn`t? ... Yeah, I don`t have one of those.