Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
How do they put the "do not walk on the grass" signs up?
Okay, calm down. Its a spider. Just one tiny litt- HOLY MOLY IT MOVED!
Is the CEO of Kraft also known as The Big Cheese?
Relax,,, We`re all crazy.. It`s not a competition.
When your wife or girlfriend asks,"Do I look fat?" the ONLY correct response is, "Do I look stupid?
Just when you think you have the answer a woman will be there to change the question.
I`m getting sick of seeing all these lyric status`s, it reminds me of somebody that I used to know.
Show him you care by setting his house on fire so he will have to move in with you and never be lonely again.
I was in NYC and a black guy asked me if the Yankees won to which I replied, "Yeah, man, you`re free."
You can tell by a woman`s feet how she feels about you. If they are behind her ears, she likes you.
I`m thinking about starting a vegetarian dance club... I`m going to call it "lettuce turnip the beets". What do you think?
Today I caught myself thinking of you and smiling... but it was because you had a booger in your nose the last time I saw you.
WOULD YOU RATHER: have six arms or giant antlers? (You don’t really get a choice; the surgeons were just sort of curious.)
I`m so out of shape, Internet Explorer could probably run faster than me.
This bottle of beer is not only delicious,,,, It also contains almost 10% of my daily requirement of beer...