Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Behind every strong woman is a man that she needs to open jars and get things off high shelves.
I told the monster in my closet that coming out of of there would make him gay, haha problem solved ....
Finally 21 and now legally able to do things which i have been doing since 15….
If you watched a person cut a piece of wood, would that be sawed or seen?
Why insult someone when you can say something nice in a very sarcastic tone.
You guys are even more beautiful now that I`m wearing my "wine glasses".
Pretty cool how the internet lets you stay connected with people you haven`t seen in years and silently judge them on a daily basis.
If there`s no god then how do you explain yoga pants?
Bike helmets only protect you from looking cool.
If a tree falls on your Ex in the woods, and no one hears it, still get rid of the chainsaw just in case.
Your mother never saw the irony in calling you son of a bitch.
Why do people with the most to say contribute the least?
never realized how awkward it is to study the reproductive system in a coffee shop.. until now.
If I can’t act weird around you, I’m sorry we can’t be friends.
Instead of going to Starbucks, I make my own coffee, yell my name out incorrectly, and then light a $5 bill on fire.