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Science is just a numbery way to explain magic.
2003: Fear that ppl from the internet will find me in real life. 2013: Fear that ppl from real life will find me on the internet.
I really shouldn`t have driven home from the bar last night. ..Especially since I walked there. :)
"Should I add more liquor?" is the most ridiculous question I`ve ever been asked.
"This is bullsh!t" - bull farmer giving barn tours
Roses are red, violets are blue, If i had a brick id throw it at you.
Calm down, take a deep breath and hold it for about 20 minutes.
Don`t worry about old age, it doesn`t last that long.
Childhood is like being drunk: Everyone remembers what you did except you.
It’s hard to tell if I’m dealing really well with life these days or if I just don’t give a sh!t.
Your giving me the silent treatment??? FKN FINALLY!!
Sometimes I meet people and feel sorry for their dog.
Looks don’t matter to me if you’re attractive.
everyone has that one crazy person in there family...but in my case everyone is just as crazy as i am!XD
My dog is eating. I`m sitting next to her, staring intently at her, making her obviously uncomfortable. Yeah, how`s THAT feel, mutt?