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I can`t afford Disney World so we go to the biggest hill on my street and my kids wait an hour before I roll them down in my office chair.
I`m an adult. I can eat a cupcake for breakfast & call it a muffin if I want
All this time I thought PTA stood for Parents to Avoid
is easily distracted by shiny objects.
I`m so bored at work that I`m actually doing my job.
We`re up to Fast n Furious #6. Shouldn`t they just create a weekly TV series?
If listening to stupid people burned calories, I`d be a supermodel.
Imagine taking your girlfriend to your friends house for the 1st time, and her phone automatically connects to his password protected wifi.
Hope you get down and funky on this the day of your birth!!
I hate laundry, dishes, sweeping, mopping, dusting, fixing and fetching. The only logical conclusion is that I am descended from royalty.
Volleyball = A more intense version of don`t let the balloon hit the floor.
The best way to let people remember you is to `borrow money from them`
Day Light savings this weekend is pissing me off, we will lose a hour we will never get back...........wait...thinkin`.....I guess we do....carry on...
wishes that more people would declare thumb wars these days. I`m sure that all this texting has prepared my thumb muscles for battle.
I remembered my wedding anniversary today. It was last week.