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How to make a Vodka Christmas cake. . (Made mine this morning!!!!) 1 cup sugar, 1 tsp. baking powder, 1 cup water, 1 tsp. salt , 1 cup brown sugar, Lemon juice, 4 large eggs, Nuts, 1......bottle Vodka, 2 cups dried fruit. Sample a cup of Vodka to check quality. Take a large bowl, check the Vodka again to be... sure it is of the highest quality then Repeat. Turn on the electric mixer. Beat one cup of butter in a large fluffy bowl. Add 1 teaspoon of sugar. Beat again. At this point, it is best to
Right now I`m having amnesia and deja vu at the same time. I think I`ve forgotten this before.
Why is it called cliffhanger and not
Christmas spirit? I`m proud to say I`ve got plenty of that. I`ve got rum, whiskey, gin, brandy, vodka and tequila.
My kids are the reason I wake up every morning. Really freaking early. Every...Single...Morning...
Conspiracy theorists are all so dumb that I suspect they`ve been planted by a secret organization to distract us from what`s really going on
The only time I hit the panic button on my car keys is accidentally, and the only person who panics is me.
I`d kill for a microwave that plays Europe`s “The Final Countdown” during the last 30 seconds.
The skinny girl inside me once tried to come out. I shut that b*tch up with a cupcake
I used to play sports. Then realized you can buy trophies. Now I´m good at everything.
I don`t think stupid people understand how much effort goes into not punching them in the face
Being an American is awesome. The end.
I have the ability to drive people crazy. I`m not sure if I was born with it or if I learned it. But damn am I great at it.
If your friends tell you not to give in to peer pressure and you don`t: technically, you did
Duct tape can`t fix stupid, but it can muffle the sound.