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Thank you, True Crime, for saying that was a reenactment. I was pretty upset your camera person didn`t stop that murder.
Today is Friday the 13th. Try not to be a teenage girl in her underwear at night at a deserted summer camp today.
What flickering lights mean: 1% electrical problems. 99% demons.
To this day, the boy that used to bully me at school still takes my lunch money. On the plus side, he makes a great Subway sandwich.
Why does `beans` only mean secret when it`s "Don`t spill the beans?" Why can`t I say I have a dirty little beans to tell you?
Save time. See it my way.
I think I`m gonna glue my thumbs to my nipples and pretend I`m a T-Rex.
I grew up living paycheck to paycheck. But through hard work and perseverance, I now live direct deposit to direct deposit.
Was just thinking …. What would the world be like if McDonalds delivered?
If Kutcher went to Sheen and said It`s still your show, this was all a joke and yelled "You got Punked" it would be the greatest prank ever.
My friends made fun of me for buying this flamethrower, but at least I don`t have to shovel snow this weekend.
I`m at my most badass when I`m popping a wheelie with a shopping cart.
I was asked what I would give the woman who has everything? Well…my phone number for a start.
I wanted to book an Elvis impersonator for a party so I phoned them up and got a call centre. It said `press 1 for the money, 2 for the show.`
I`ve got worms !!!! ......... worms in me garden