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Some men get naked when they have to count up to 21...
Coffee : Starter fluid for the morning impaired.
People treat New Year’s like some sort of life changing event. If your life sucks today, it’s probably still going to suck tomorrow
I really hate it when people need constant re-assurance. You know what I mean?
RUN? I thought you said Rum. I quit.
Just about the time I started to give a crap, my attitude became constipated......
Everytime I see a mattress tied to the top of a car, I think….there’s another prostitute making a house call……
The first guy who persuaded a blind guy to wear sunglasses, must have been a hell of a salesman.
I don’t mean to brag but when I’m at the Taco Bell drive thru placing my order, I don’t even look at the prices.
If I haven’t embarrassed myself in front of you… don’t worry, it’ll happen.
Good for you, people that do things.
Have you ever noticed that the & symbol looks like a guy dragging his butt across the floor?
I was the only one that cared when Jimmy cracked corn.
I`m writing this status very slowly, cause I know you guys can`t read very fast.
New documentary movie about white trash .... I only saw the trailer ....