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I just found out cock fighting is done with roosters and now it feels like this 6 months of training has been wasted.
Insert coin to view my status message.
Itβs not the destination, itβs the journey. Except when youβre heading to the bathroom with explosive diarrhea.
Why do medications always have side effects like `anal leakage` & `suicidal thoughts`? Why not `invisibility` or `spontaneous orgasms`?
When I was your age we had to open all doors by ourselves ... None of them knew we were coming.
I peed so hard that a little laugh came out
When I was six, my dad threw me into the pool thinking I would instantly learn to swim. I probably would if it had water in it.
Anyone know where I can get a waterproof recliner for my shower?
My screensaver is a screenshot of a bunch of spreadsheets so my boss doesnβt notice when I havenβt moved my mouse in an hour.
Hi everyone! Welcome to AA. This is a "judgment free" zone...unless we`re talking about Janice who ate all the cookies last week.
M?o?n?, T?u?e?s?, W?e?d?, T?h?u?r?s?, Friday !!!!
I think I may be getting harder to love.
If weβre not supposed to eat late, then why is there a light in the fridge?
A world without Facebook would be much more productive.
Why is it Donald Duck never wore pants but always had a towel wrapped around his waist when he got out of the shower?