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Wrapping these baby carrots in Tootsie Roll wrappers is exhausting but the payoff will be worth it come Halloween.
"I`d like a bowl of soup please." "Any sides?" "I hope so, or it`ll go EVERYWHERE."
It saddens me to say that after tasting this homemade whiskey/nacho cheese ice cream, I’ve found not all dreams are meant to be followed.
I’d like to see the dollar store get a liquor license.
I`m now at the age where if I see a nice nursing home, I make a mental note of it.
Women have all the answers, to all of your questions, and you don`t even have to ask.
How many selfies does it take to get to the center of attention?
I love talking about nothing. It’s the only thing I know anything about.
Amazing how many people just stroll into tattoo parlors and say "Give me the dumbest thing you can think of."
If you get a new job before you quit your old one, it`s considered responsible. But if you do that with your gf, it`s called "cheating."
My body is by no means a temple but it can be one heck of a amusement park ride...
Fact: If you eat a slice of pizza fast enough, your body won`t understand how many calories are in it.
I never finish anyth...............
I was trying to think of something really deep to post on Facebook this morning. The Mariana Trench comes to mind.
Is it just me, or would those movies had been far scarier if they were titled "Monday the 13th"